Pain. Unrelenting, debilitating pain. All day. All night.
Abdomen, left kidney/lower back, pelvis, the privates – all of it.
Is it the cancer? Is it the impacted stool? Is it the stent? Is it all of it?
Have been “going” for the past hour or so but no relief. Even so, it’s good to be going.
Very, very demoralizing. Pain cuts you down physically and emotionally.
I can’t think. I can’t dream.
For about ten minutes today, I experienced relief. I sat outside in the sun and looked at the tall grass blowing, the trees, the flowers. I relaxed. It was a respite and I appreciated every minute of it.
Someone has to help me.