December 28, 2020 – Evening

Hi. It’s evening.

I’ve been googling. Very bad idea. I should know better by now.

I’m upset. You know what I learned from my google foray? No one knows anything, that’s what. Absolutely nothing.

THEY DON’T KNOW. They don’t know if the treatment will be effective; how long it will be effective; how you will react to it; whether the tumor will shrink and the extent to which the shrinkage will prolong your life; or how long you will live. “My doctor told me I had 3 years to live and that was 7 years ago.” What?! How can modern medicine be that far off? How about this – new drug being touted for its ability to prolong life by six months – six months?! Six months is better than no months but we’re all shooting for years here.

I need to refocus. I need to think about the things I want to do and accomplish – small things, big things. Big thing: work on my project. Small thing: try a new yeast to see if I can get my cinnamon rolls to rise more. Anything.

A spring garden …

Reality check: I have not been given bad news and I’m wasting my time dwelling on things I cannot control and do not even fully understand. I need to enjoy this time. Things could be much worse in all realms.

OK – I feel better now! To heck with it all!!!

Love, Molly

P.S. I (pretty much) stuck to my diet today. Yeah!

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